I'm not going to sugar coat it. Life's been a bit hard lately. Work has me busier (but more fulfilled) than I could ever have imagined. We had a death in the family. I'm trying desperately to have as lazy of a summer as my reality will allow. And really, I've been doing a lot of reflecting lately.
We're trying so hard to move next month to the Orange Circle, one of my favorite places in the world. Why do we want to leave this little apartment we've come to call home? Well, for starters, we want a yard. With a garden. With a dog in it. We want that life. We want it so badly that I've broken down in front of friends, who probably thought I was absolutely nuts.
I think at times I forget that I'm still on the younger side, and I put so much pressure on myself to have that life, that I become so drained that I can't even enjoy my true life, which is really quite wonderful. I feel so much pressure from myself to have it all figured out, and get so upset with myself when I stumble a bit. But the truth is, I love life. I love my future life, and I love my past life, and I certainly love my current life.
And what I need to realize is that I can't get so caught up in future plans and my self-prescribed ideals that I lose site of right now. Because now is what matters most.